When you are where you are meant to be.... things flow.

Yesterday was a strange day. It was my first day after (finally) finishing the uni term, a uni term that had damn near traumatised me. Last term I took on fulltime uni as we had settled into Kalgoorlie to work for 6 months or so and Zac had just started daycare two days a week. However - that "plan" (like many, when you become a parent) was not to be.

Zac instantly hated daycare... He cried from the moment we dropped him off until the moment we picked him up. His teachers were stressed because he seemed to be the "exception" to the whole "Oh, he will be laughing and playing (and stop crying) as soon as you're out ther door", instead - he was very consistant for a couple of weeks at two days a week. We realised this was causing him ALOT of stress and his teachers were having trouble giving him the support he needed because they simply hadn't experienced such a consistantly sad child.

This led to us pulling him out of daycare, I mean - I enjoy every moment with my son. When he is in daycare I miss him terribly. I (honestly) only sent him because it is the "thing you do" but my husband pointed out that alot of our life decisions go against that grain so if I love being with Zac and dont mind having him home full time, then why send him to daycare when he clearly isnt settling in? We believe that he wasnt settling in because of our lifestyle and always moving around, as he previously LOVED his "home-daycare" he used to attend (read: this would have been an entirely different situation if he had have settled in happily - he would still be attending now).

Thus the decision was finalised, and although my time alone went down to basically zero, my uni workload persisted. This lead to a very stressful term for me! I experienced alot of guilt because there were many times I had to just give up and sit Zac in front of the TV so that I could get some work done (those who know me know that I am the kinda mum whom is ALWAYS playing with her child and teaching him things and going outdoors with him when we are together) so this all added to both of our stress levels, which then bounced off eachother even more so.

Anyway, I woke up yesterday with no uni work and was just baffled... We got up slowly and casually, I washed some dishes, tidied the van, got ontop of the washing. Then we went and caught up with some friends we have met here in Kalgoorlie, THEN we came home... and relaxed??!?!?!?!?

..... it was BLISSFUL!

We made the bed so it was nice and neat, then layed on the bed, under the aircon and played cars, puzzles, lego, flash cards, dominoes, for hours. It felt so good to just be able to enjoy Zac again and play with him with my attention all on him. Then around 5:30 in the afternoon I took him for a big walk around Boulder while the sun started to get lower in the sky. Would you believe that after all of this attention, busy day etc. he fell STRAIGHT to sleep when I put him to bed. Wow, It all just felt so right, like it is the way its meant to be for us - like everything was flowing naturally again. (the last three weeks zac has experienced a major sleep regression, thats why this sleep "thing" has been massive for us now).

I hadnt realised how much my desire to get a qualification was affecting Zacs life. I knew I took on too much but I didnt realise how much my inability to keep up with it all was responsible for all of the massive changes Zac has been experiencing lately. With this thought in mind; life feels so blissful again. I love enjoying Zac and making the most of every second I have with him, so I am so happy to get to experience that again.

Today it has been the same, a nice relaxing morning with a little bit of housework. Then the day is ours, to play and learn together, to enjoy eachothers company and experience life together. I feel so lucky to be in a position to be home with my son all the time, I feel grateful that I enjoy his company so much and that I get to really teach him the basics aswell as about life and the world.

So today I am a little "high on life", I feel really happy, relaxed, at ease and inspired. I feel energised and ready to really be the mum I always wanted to be. I know my son would be proud of me in years to come if I could stand up and say "I singlehandedly finished a FULLTIME uni degree in just a few years, while raising my child and having a husband working extremely long hours. Because of this I was able to take on a high paying job and buy my son everything he could have dreamed of", but I know I am raising a child whom would be prouder to be able to say "my mum taught me the ABC, to read, to write, to play and how to be a good person, she was always there when I needed her and my memories are of her time, not of objects".

I feel so grateful for everything my life has brought to me. There have been some substantially tough times, but they have only intensified my desire to sieze the moment, be with my husband and son and experience a simple, happy life.

Giving so much yet receiving even more.

I have found myself thinking alot lately about people less fortunate than us. I hate the thought of people 'going without' when my family has such an abundance of 'things' (despite living in a caravan).

Where am I going with this?
I took some time this week to go through our caravan. I somehow managed to find an entire box of books, close to 6 bags of clothing (mine, Brents and Zacs) and a few toys, houshold items etc. I put it all in boxes and donated it to a wonderful local woman whom distributes the good she recieves among local, struggling families, nearby aboriginal communites and multiple charities.

This got me thinking about what we need V's what we dont need
I realised that my son had draws of clothes (two VERY deep draws and the top half of a wardrobe, to be exact). He has this same amount (and somtimes more) every year (for every different size) and for the warm and cold seasons. The more I thought about this the more excessive it seemed to me. I mean, he barely even gets to through the top three items of each pile and they are all at least ten, maybe fifteen items deep.

Yet there are children out there with hardly any clothing
There are so many children I see around from families whom struggle to make ends meet, from local aboriginal communities and children that have runaway from home, or young teenagers whom have children and also struggle to make ends meet. Yet my son, Brent (my husband) and I, have wardrobes full of clothing we dont even wear one tenth of.

What can you and your family do without?
Im sure you have things in your home you could do without. Things you dont use anymore or things you bought "just incase" but know you wont use. Things that were given to you as gifts or given to your children but are no longer used. These things not only take up space in your house but owning them takes up space in your mind (remember, at any given time you can respond to someone if they ask if you own a particular item, even if its out of your sight or hasnt been used in years, this means that all of those bits and pieces laying around in your house are taking up precious space in your mind, being stored up there so you can remember them if you ever need to reference them or use them).

Getting rid of these items, downsizing your childrens toys, your wardrobes, the "bits and bobs" in your numberous 'junk draws', wont just free up space in your house, it will take away some of the clutter from inside your mind. Why do you think it always feels so great when you fill a trailor load to go to the tip or fill the back seat of your car with items to go to charity? Those items are no longer needing to be organised and retained in your mind.

Books and toys
Our children accumulate so many books and toys over the years. They get more of them for Christmas and birthdays yet the old ones stick around too. So many children go without gifts, go without toys and books. These small, seemingly 'silly' items can bring so much joy to children experiencing adverse living situations or tough times financially for their family.

Clear out before santa comes
Have you ever thought about clearing out before santa comes? Rather than keeping all of the older, outdated, no longer used or no longer age appropriate books and toys can create more room. I make a point of going through my sons toys for items that are no longer age appropriate for him. These are the type of toys that are made for children a little younger (like he was when I bought them) the kind of toys that are find for a small, less coordinated two year old, but a rowdy three year old will simply break as opposed to enjoy. I take these toys out when the new, more grown up toys come in at special times of the year. Then I can donate the no longer age appropriate toys, to other children, still in great condition.

This means that other children are able to enjoy them, I have recycled, I have potentially given children gifts whom may not have recieved them (and therefore put a smile on their face), ive taught my son about being generous and humble and I've also create room in our home, lives, time, and minds for new, age appropriate toys and books.

What about all of that food?
We all have them... Those various, random jars and tins at the back of our pantry. The items we bought on sale when we seen those alluring yellow signs stating "two for one" and so on. I had so much food in our van that I not only had a full pantry with jars and packets of food (aswell as overhead cabinets full of baking ingredients) - I also had a 55 litre plastic tub (or two) in my annex full of food. I went through and donated all of the excess items. They were being wasted sitting there, they were things we had bought incase of needing extra food one week, but had never used. There were tinned versions of items we are able to afford to buy fresh, there were tinned soups but now i have learned how to make my own, there were graxy mixes (but now I make my own from scratch) same goes for spaghetti sauces, pasta sauces, prepackaged flavoured pastas etc. All of the things I have learned to (and now prefer to) make myself, from scratch.

So I decided to donate them all to a local food bank. I donated an entire 55 litre tub and I was informed that it was promtly delivered to a family who honestly didnt know how they were going to eat that week. They had small children and like all of us experience at some point in our lives - were struggling financially. These items would have sat in our pantry, even though we already had enough food to last weeks, maybe even a month or two. While a family could have been sitting at their table wondering how they would feed their children.

You may not having any items to give?
How about your time? Its true what they say - time is precious. If you have a few hours to spare why not donate them to a worthy cause. You can search (online or locally) to find somthing that suits you, your age, your capabilities, your time, commitments etc. There is a charity option for everyone. You dont have to give items, you can give a helping hand. You can volunteer to help young mothers learn domestic skills, to teach craft to aboriginal children in outback communities, to read stories to children, to have a chat with the elderly, to plant trees or care for animals. There are so many ways to give back to the community that gives so much to you.

The emptyness makes me smile
I look around our caravan and our wardrobes are no longer overstuffed (they are infact half empty), yet we are comfortably clothed, Our kitchen cupboards and draws are no longer jammed with unused utencils and food items but our stomachs are full. My son isnt lost in a sea of toys, yet he is entertained and content. All of the things we have given away have not taken a thing away from our life but have potentially brought some joy to someone elses.

Dont hold onto it

Why sit there, with all of these unused items, for no reason, when they could bring joy and comfort to the lives of others. Knowing you have helped people can also bring joy and comfort to your own life.

Christmas is a time for giving, what can you give?

Just a few thoughts on positivity and nature.

Before we began this adventure we were different to whom we are today. There is no denying that living on the road promotes a lot of personal change and growth, as does any dramatic change in your life. We knew there would be changes, well we hoped, but we didn’t realise they would be so dramatic.

You can easily account for all of the physical ways your life will change but there is no way you can prepare for how much that will spill into the mental/emotional aspects of what makes you, you. You discover new (and sometimes old) things about yourself, you reignite passion that had been lost in routine and you let go, of many negative past experiences. I like to consider myself a spiritual or thoughtful person so read on for my interpretation of the change and growth I have experienced as a result of this adventure.

'Let it go'

For me, the “letting go” has been the most dramatic change. I was an extremely “hardened” person due to being let down by the world, many times in my short life and never truly understanding why. For someone of just 25 years of age I had experienced enough loss to last a lifetime, enough emotional and physical pain to really start to feel that the world “had it in” for poor little me (don’t we all feel that way sometimes, though?). I didn’t understand all of the bad things that had happened and I gauged my self-worth, and ability to be happy based on the negative experiences of the past.

This kind of mindset had fashioned me into a stressed, over-emotional, pessimistic shadow of the woman I hoped to be. It dictated my days, my relationships with others and my passion for life, in subtle and overwhelming ways.  Even when I was happy and content ‘in the moment’ I was aware and held back by the fact that it could all be taken away at any second and nothing was within my control.

When we moved into our van and began travelling I didn’t necessarily gain a massive amount of control that had been missing from my life. I gained an entirely new perspective and emotional response to my past. I gained the ability to “let it go”. I’m not 100% sure of what aspect of the adventure facilitated this element of growth, whether it was the actual act of downsizing and leaving everyone and everything we knew. Perhaps it was seeing a new place every day or meeting new people or all of these things combined? I know it certainly had something to do with being so close to nature.

I tend to harp on a lot about the healing power nature possesses, because I genuinely believe it played a role in my personal growth. Immersing yourself in nature is not only reaffirming but the minimalistic non-material aspect of it makes it something you can subconsciously depend on when other resources may dry up. You don’t need to control nature yet you don’t feel disconnected from your own future when you immerse yourself in it. Being able to seek out nature (by going on camping trips or picnics or even travelling Australia in a van or tent) and wander through a forest or watch a sunset over the beach provides the most simplistic form of joy and happiness.

What do you see when you look at this photo? Nothing? The outback? I see "Mundi Mundi Plains" a place where the flat lands stretch out so far that you can actually see the curvature of the earth. Seeing somthing like this certainly gives you a different perspective on the world.

For me, enjoying nature and the outdoors has been fundamental to growing as a person. When I sit on a beach and watch the sunset, or let the red sand of the dessert sift through my fingers I experience optimistic emotions and a vigour or passion for life. I feel inspired by nature and its beauty. I let go of the past and relax, physically and mentally, into the woman I am meant to be. My family and I relax and we are flooded with endorphins and energy to conquer any emotional or physical barrier. Never underestimate the positive effect that getting outside and immersing yourself and your family in nature could have on your life, your relationships and your overall happiness.

Little things that bring me happiness..

I like to consider myself an "easily pleased" person - a simple soul. Although I think alot of people attach negative ties to the word and concept of being "simple". I guess I should take a moment to explain that I perhaps define "simple" a little differently and in a far more positive light than others traditionally do. I suppose this is obvious from the title of my blog and the following posts that suggest I like to lead a less "materialistic" life as opposed to being a "simple"- minded halfwit.

So I figured I'd post about a few simplistic, little (I dare not write "small") things that make me feel happy. Some of these are things I do - specifically to create a few moments of happiness, some of these are things that simply happen naturally and then result in happiness and some of them just are what they are. So here goes:

This reminds me of my son because he insists that his be painted aswell if he catches me doing mine. lol (lucky for me though when we do that it doesn't spark worldwide controversy)

- Painting my toe nails freakishly bright (and sometimes mismatched) colours. I used to stick to an extremely unoriginal "red" pedicure (you know the kind, most ladies swear by it). Then one day I was lured in by a beautiful almost flurescent purple colour so I painted it on and everytime I looked down that day I felt cheerful. Today I painted my toe nails a bright watermelon-esque shade which I love to look at and smile. The only issue is that I now have about 20 very much redundant bottles of slightly differing shades of red nail varnish!

- Sunsets/sunrises make me smile, feel positive, feel happy, feel inspired. They are like food for my soul. Setting my alarm and waking up at the crack of dawn to witness a sunrise is like popping a drug for me. It 100% of the time leads to a more relaxed, positive, happy day.

- My sons giggles and cuddles, but no, I'm not sharing those! That crazy little lout and his giggle, I mean it sounds like it should have come out of a five year old girl but nope - it came out of my three year old boy. That sound just makes me pull this "overwhelmed" face. My husband and I look at eachother in amazement, everytime we hear that sound. We are both always shocked by how much happiness it creates within us. I'm still not sure if its the actual sound or what the sound represents. Afterall - for a preant there is no greater joy than a happy child.

- Music - Whether I play the radio softly in the background or plug in my Iphone and crank the volume, it always makes me happier. A few songs guaranteed to make me smile (click on the links after each song to listen to them/watch them on YouTube - you wont regret it - although some of them have advertisment videos you have to click to skip before watching the song):

*Sarah Mclaughlans version of The Beatles "Blackbird"  

( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHEOGmiPXyc )

* Seeker Lover Keeper "even though I'm a woman"

( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qeLI_6t6ds&ob=av2e )

* Cold Chisel "Flame Trees"
( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILd1O44BDqc )

* Ben Harper "Forever" (this was my wedding song)
( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHzAVDg4m1Q )

* Eagle Eye Cherry "save tonight" (this is for some reason my alltime favourite song)
( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTa2Bzlbjv0 )

* Cyndi Lauper "true colours"

( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPn0KFlbqX8&ob=av2e )

* Everclear "Everything To Everyone" (there is a little musical add before this clip - just skip the add)

( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1vQJFF2TKQ&ob=av2n )

Theres obviously a billion more songs that have this effect on me. It would take me forever to list them all! 

- just going outside for a walk in the fresh air. Works a treat, gets the endorphins flowing.

- Going swimming. I LOVE the water. Sometimes it takes a bit of pushing to get myself to get up and go swimming but I always feel wonderful when I am in the water. It could be the beach, the river, the pool... Even the shower. I love being in the water. It makes me very happy.

- Reading. I love reading a book but its almost impossible to get a quiet minute alone. A good book can take you anywhere, through any emotion any life, anything is possible. I love reading "real life" books like biographies and memoirs. Memoirs are my favourite. I love a good "positive" ending.

- Baking/cooking. That sense of satisfaction when you have somehow managed to grab a bunch of inedible ingredients and fashioned them into a feast.. Its unbeatable. Not to mention the actual amazing sensation of DELICIOUS food on your palette. Mmmm. The cleanup, however... makes me not so happy.

- Playing guitar, I rarely play guitar because my guitar is at my mums house at the moment. Occasionally I whip my husbands one out and I just dont think anything can beat that beautiful, acoustic flow. I love it. Even if I can only remember three chords at the most, they still somehow manage to blend together to create a soothing melody.

- Walking on the beach, but I wont elaborate because theres not much of that going on here in Kalgoorlie (I suggest you "google earth" Kalgoorlie, then you will understand).

- Cuddling/talking to/playing with my guinea pig. Well the "family" guinea pig, whom I tend to hog all to myself. Animals are soothing and beautiful and Pepper- George is no exception to that rule. He is a wonderful creature whom always cheers me up.

- Writing, writing cheers me up, as does reading the writing of others - especially blogs. I lov writing my thoughts and feelings and reading them back over, it gives me as much perspective as a good, solid session with a counsellor or therapist. Somtimes I read back the words I have just written and it's asif it is the first time I have ever heard them, even though my soul has been screaming them for months. Somtimes when I write things down and read it back I learn entirely new things about myself and what makes me tick, things that help me to understand what path I should be following. It may not be like this for everyone, but for me writing is soothing and brings happiness.

There are a myriad of other things and experiences that make me happy but I'd be here forever if I listed them all too. The way I see it is that the little things are as important (if not more so) than the big things. Not only are the little things easier to achieve but they also all add up to create an overall "buzz" of happiness and positivity.

Never underestimate the small, simple, things in life. Never downplay the huge impact they can make on your life. When you lose sight of how important all of the tiny, seemingly insignificent moments are, you lose sight of the big picture too. Don't brush off the little things on the way to some "bigger picture". Those little things along the way are definates, definitive moments of happiness and no matter how fleeting they are, they ARE there whereas the "big picture" may never come or may not be what you expected when it does come.

Moments... can last forever.